How I slept with my mother

He worked in one of the defunct  first generation Banks and became a  Bank Manager of a Branch  at  the age of 30  for ten years. But for  thirty years he has been living from hand to mouth. In his hey days he was brilliant and was known for his love for Algebra and Geometry  . Today he is 72years old and his head is full of grey hair but he is  suffering . When he met a powerful  Prophet who asked  him to confess  the  sin NOT CRIME  he once committed against his mother .

He then gave a mind -blowing confession that could make one go mad!.

He said  ” BoN  please write your story but DON’T EVER,  I repeat DON’T EVER  mention my name for I will not only CURSE but also SUE you . This condition was met by this reporter.

      The old man paused and  looked around as if he was being pursued . He smiled again and  soliloquized “I made some blunders. I  made some blunders. I just need to beg God for forgiveness but it was not my  fault , it was the devil’s handiwork.

”Do you remember the man that used to have carnal knowledge with his mother on our street when we were young?. Do you  remember how we used to point at him while going on the streets? . By then many thought he was  mad  ,  now I know that he was not mad. I remember that in villages many knew what was happening  but in the cities hardly will they  know especially those living in flats.  Now let me tell you my own story.

“When I was very young and naive I met a friend who told me how he was making love with his mother . I said “impossible”. He smiled   and said ” it is simple and easy” .  This thought  flooded my mind while growing up. Whenever my mother and sisters were having their bath I would be peeping  through the gaps  in the  thatched   leaves /palm fronds in the village.  Later we all moved to  another town  where my brother was living with his wife who was expecting  a baby . I had already become  peeping  Tom, as I peeped through the key hole and I always watched my brother’s wife having bath. I extended it to my mother  too .

“One day I met my mother  who carelessly  slept off in her room  half -naked with a lubricant  and vibrator. I later discovered that she was always alone  in her room while the  television would be switched on,  but no voice for she would turn the volume down . I have caught her red -handed many times with   a bottle of  local gin, kainkain , later  I took it as habit buying  bottles of the illicit gin for her always .

“One evening she was drunk  and senselessly   allowed me to   watch the adult film together in her room . Before I knew what was happening she had  grabbed my John Thomas   which had been dangling and moving its head like agama agama lizard.  And that was all I could remember  until I was lost in  her  deep forest as she was moaning begging me not to leave. That was how  I had my  first experience and  I started sleeping with my mother without the knowledge of my brother and his wife for five years .

”I   started sleeping in her room and nobody ever thought of what we were doing. When I was working  as auxiliary  teacher  I would rush home  at  break time to have a quickie with her. I found it interesting and fun,never a sin!. Meanwhile my brother and his wife thought I was a serious person who did not like women or sex for not bringing ladies home. After my brother’s wife gave birth , my mother still stayed.

”Our sexual escapades got to its climax when I rented a room  apartment and was living alone. My brother implored me to  stay in order   to have enough savings before I move but because of the free sex I was having I refused. My mother would come and spend days  with me in the name of coming to say hello to me yet my brother was ignorant of everything.

”One  day my landlady caught us red-handed while we were doing  it in my small living room , we forgot to lock the door from behind.  She  had wanted to give me the receipt of the house rent I paid  for the previous day and met me on top of my mother  jerking her while she  was screaming  and moaning at the same time  wriggling  her waist but  I couldn’t stop, you know when you are in Cloud 9 and your brain is charged cum your blood running in your veins .We continued for we were lost in the lust .My eyes bulged out as if trying to burst.Yes, the kainkain I took was working!.

”However, the landlady who was an elderly and wise woman called me and my mother separately and talked to us to stop the act. She even called me secretly and asked whether I was doing it for ritual purpose and I said ”no”. But as the devil would have it , we continued until she reported me to my older brother who cried                    ‘ abomination’.  He  threatened to report me to my father who was still alive in the village .

”We stopped doing it .

”My mother became sick .She was taken to the hospital where a doctor said she was having fibroid that made her to be bleeding.By then she was 55 years of age and she did not go back to the village because my father had other wives.

”Her cries and bleeding  from the fibroid pain  was too much .At the hospital the doctor said it  could be fibroid. But when she went to another doctor, a scan was done and  she was told that  she was  four  months  pregnant with twin babies as the scan showed there was no fibroid but babies!.

”We shamefully told my brother who said she should abort it . But the doctor said the abortion might lead to her untimely death.

”My mother begged to go and rent another house in order to have the baby for my brother  and I were the only children  she had . She  refused to abort the babies  and was attending   antenatal Clinic.  These twin  babies were delivered in 1980. This January they would be 40years old. They read good and lucrative  Courses ;Medicine and Mechanical Engineering  and came out in flying colours and  are graduates of …. from the University of… they have good job but with unstable lives!. They are not married  .. They are known and popular . Each time they ask of their mother I would not tell them the true story.

”Each time I looked at the twins  who are males I feel ashamed  while my mother always argued and consoled herself that that is how God wanted it , and if He had not wanted it the babies would not have stayed. She would stupidly and foolishly be referring to the  Bible and be saying ‘‘oju ri iru re ri” (Meaning  it is not a new thing) what a shameless mother I have!.  I could not marry for anytime I proposed to ladies they would tell me their spirit rejected me.

For several years I have not been doing any tangible thing .Few years ago my twins came to ask me some pertinent questions on why their lives were rough and not making it .They said a strong Prophet told them I committed an abomination. Apart from that they asked me to confess the relationship between me and their late mother.I knew they must have been told.

”I have told the Prophet the naked truth and the whole story of my life. He asked me to  call elderly people in the family  and beg the these children.”

Confession of a dying police officer

 The old man was  barking like a dog while narrating  his story . He however begged that the story should not be published until after his demise. He died in  October  last year and we are publishing his heart -wrenching story that would send shivers into your spines.

For six months  the Muslim Cleric  Seriki  Karoose  Sokoto (not real names)Sokoto could not go out  as his children locked him up in a room. Reason: maggots were coming out from his body (from head to toe) and the whole house was wafted with foul  odour.   During  the day Pa Sokoto  would be barking like a dog while in  the night  he would be screaming  and begging the unseen hands flogging him to forgive  him.

The Muslim Cleric  Seriki  Karoose  Sokoto (not real names) insisted that his  two grown- up children must not  join the Police Force. In spite  of his disapproval ,one  of them secretly enlisted. On his deathbed he called his two children; Azeez and Adamu and said ”  it is high time I let  you know the truth about my identity. Do you know why I don’t have a cellphone and don’t appear in the  social media?. I don’t belong to this  land , my real  names are Aseyiowuu  Esanake (not real names)  and I was a Christian by birth but not a Muslim  .My parents were staunch  Christians”.  



” I finished my secondary school at Saretete Village,  I worked as a temporary teacher and later joined the Police Force in 1977 at the age of 30  after  a rigorous  training  from  the popular  Police College . It was a one -year training where they  shaved our  heads  and were given a pair of shorts and Singlets  . After the training I was posted to Calabar  and ‘armed’ with my baton and torchlight the first  compulsory two tools  of a policeman  . I  later   worked my transfer back to Lagos where I had lived for years and a  lucrative city  for the   kind of  my  profession . My dream to become a police officer   fulfilled  .I joined the Police Force because of the uniform which was always starched and the respect they  give them  cum  the  fear instilled in the civilians’ hearts about them .In a nutshell a police officer was  like a tin god in those days.

“When I rose to the rank of  an Inspector , and  they added the  prefix ”Inspector”, to my name and started calling me  Oga Inspector  and I felt happy  and great. Inspector? .I  dreamt that one day I would become the Inspector General of  the  Police  Force. Each time I glanced at the big photo frames of the past IGs , I would smile , and say to myself  that one day my own picture would  be hung there and I would be fulfilled.


                   BoN’s Adventure

”As a recruit then my salary was 80 Naira per month.The money though was small but I was satisfied .I always took my uniform to the dry cleaner  which was always well -starched and well- ironed with the ropes attracting  many. My shoe? ,always shinning . In fact I go about with a brush and polish to do justice to  my shoe when dusty .I had a wife and two children at the age of 33.


”Lest I forget to remind you that  I  hated corruption,  whenever  my colleagues collected money from the civilians  who had civil or  criminal cases  I always rejected and used to preach to  them that it’s evil and that they would be visitors  in  hell fire.

”One day, before I left home my wife fell ill, my two children were thrown out of school for non  payment of tuition fees. I went to work hoping to borrow money from my boss. But my boss said he had nothing on  him. Full of sadness ,when I returned  home I found my wife stiff . She was stone  dead! .

”I broke down and wept .Her ailment was  malaria cum hypertension but all the medicines the doctor prescribed for her  were not bought. No money!.

”After her death my friends and family members who I once begged to borrow me money came with stupid  surprises to assist me for the burial and life continued .

”One year after my salary was increased  to 135 Naira per month. But after paying for house rent, children’s needs and other things I had nothing on me and in church I heard how the preachers rebuke  givers and takers of bribe as they were compared with the  Biblical  Zacheaus the  tax collector.

”One day , Ayo my son was sick, he had malaria while his older brother , Paul  had  appendicitis, the doctor asked us to come for the surgery which would cost  30naira , but instead I started applying palm oil as soothing balm while  he was groaning in pains and rolling on the ground . Later he could not bear it .I appealed to many to assist but none came to   my aid.


”In the evening I went out  with my torchlight , baton and gun and  mounted an illegal check point .In a nutshell I realized 50 Naira that  evening when my salary was 135 Naira per month! 

”I quickly went back home and took Ayo and Paul  to the Hospital and  Paul  had surgery for his  ruptured appendicitis   .The doctor was angry that it was  almost  late .

”He prescribed some drugs for Ayo and asked me to pay for another drug , I didn’t tell him that I didn’t have but went back to where I went the previous night, mounted illegal  roadblock and  realized   20 Naira ,used it to buy drugs and  that was how he was saved .

”By and by my attitude towards life changed .I became a ”good” man to my boss for  whenever they bring any case to me I would charge the two  warring parties :the accused and the defendant  and collect  money from them .I would not settle  any   case without being offered money  .


”One day, I was broke and needed to entertain my  friends who would be visiting in the evening , since I had been used to the road block and known, I changed my style. I with two of my colleagues went to Agege  Pen Cinema as Traffic Wardens , we stopped an old man and checked all his papers which were all perfect in all sincerity . Since  there was no offence  to charge or accuse him of , we lied that his car tires were not  of the same product .The  old man came down and pleaded that  they were of same sizes but different make , we demanded 20 Naira or else he would go to the station.

“The fairly old man  begged us  and said that his son was sick and was taking him to the hospital .We ignored his pleadings ,  I went to the front of the car and wrote down the plate number and put it in my breast pocket. He   pleaded and later handed 20 Naira over to my colleague   after saying  some inaudible words  we couldn’t hear.

”After 30minutes the old man   left, my colleague  who collected the money  started laughing and dancing showing everybody the 20 Naira note. My colleague , would look at the money, laugh and run around showing everybody the money . At first I thought he was playing until he removed his clothes and started walking about naked till this day.

“For weeks I  became confused with what I saw. Later I summoned courage and said it  was his destiny . I was there and knew that   popular Police officer called Iya Toyin who was a no – nonsense Police  Traffic  Warden and  feared by all motorists in Lagos. Her story was known by many motorists in  Lagos.

”I remember a colleague of mine who collected bribe from a woman early  one fateful   morning , immediately the woman left my  colleague started climbing electric poles until he climbed one and went ahead to hold on to the wires, and the rest was history. Another officer kept on saluting electric poles anywhere he sighted them   till he died. I remember Inspector J who kept on dancing throughout his lifetime without drum .When I saw these I thought I  should refrain from collecting bribe but I had been used to it , my salary was no longer enough for me .I had no choice than to go back to road blocks.


”One day , two men approached me and asked me to cooperate and to look the other way  during their robbery operation. They gave me 50,000 Naira . Imagine how much it was then.

”Not quite 30 minutes I heard the sound of guns and saw smoke dancing towards heaven. I saw four  people on the ground , lay dead. I ran there to have a look, alas , one of them was my immediate younger brother who went to cash money from  the Bank. The robbers killed and made  away  with thousands of Naira  from the bank. For days I could not eat and could not tell anybody .Blood money!”.

”One day I was broke and needed money .I contacted a friend of mine who said he would assist me if I could keep the secret to myself .


”Two days later this my friend came to see me in the office and told me there was a problem , he narrated how two fresh heads were found in his bag. He  confessed that he along with his friend beheaded two young men  for money making ritual. Before you say Jack Robinson , money had exchanged hands .I was given 50,000 Naira , and this money was distributed among my bosses and the rest as they say, is history. In fact  as if this was not enough, a woman was caught red handed for killing her husband ,first degree murder, but when she came with money , the rest again became history as usual.

”I was involved in many atrocities in my life .I knew a Pastor who was charged  for rape ,  an Imam was nabbed for gun running and  human rituals . A man who  was caught red handed  during robbery  was changed with another innocent  man in the night and was charged to court and sentenced to death while the original sinner was going about , walking free! 

”My sons don’t trust any police officer for they could set their parents up  because of money.

”One day I shot a Youth Corper  , a young graduate of engineering because he failed to give me five Naira I demanded from him .It was dead in the  night and he was the only one in the car, dead drunk. He exchanged hot words with me . After shooting him , I dragged his corpse  into  a nearby bush. Nobody saw  me or suspected me to date!

”The second day I went there and still saw the corpse but kept quiet.The case was reported that a dead body was sighted and I was asked to investigate it . Some of the  friends he once  quarreled with were arrested as suspects but after many  investigations by the  police, and court ….they were discharged and acquitted.


”There is no Babalawo, Alfaa and Spiritualists that I did not patronize  from Lagos, Ogun, Ondo, Oyo and Eastern states .I have one room full of juju,  in the four bedroom flat I built .There were  days I had to fast and must not sleep with  women. There were days I slept with mad women in Lagos and Ibadan  in the dead of the night and I would pretend to be  a mad man. There were days I had to go out naked  chanting incantations in the night in  market places . I had soaked myself in human blood for  hours and I had bathed using  twins’ placentas. I had shaved  many ladies and used their pubic hairs for rituals all to make sure I  was not killed or caught and  to cover  up my evil deeds. I had slept with dead bodies in the mortuary and gone to  the cemeteries in the dead of the night to receive power. I ate  the  tongue of a dead man raw!.


”The last straw  that broke the camel’s  back  and made me to  voluntarily resigned from the Police job was the one that jolted me most .

”One day I was alerted that some armed bandits were raiding some houses and a bank  .I called the Police station ( Division A) and we reinforced Mobile Policemen there .There was rain of bullets  on us as  we struggled to get some of the robbers , two were mowed down and four arrested  .The robbers’ strayed bullets had killed three people and a pregnant woman who tried to escape from their house to another safer place. The operation lasted two hours and we went back to our station. I slept at the station and the second day went back home. As I got to the entrance of my house I saw many people wailing and gnashing their teeth. I thought it was one of the family members of the victims. I went to relax in a beer parlour to cool down with a cold  bottle of beer before going back home. Here we discussed the operation that took place the previous night and how we fired the robbers and arrested four of them while four of them escaped with  bullet wounds .

” Again my  cellular phone rang and it was emergency from  the office as I was instructed to join some Mobile policemen to arrest some suspects with bullet wounds at an hospital .We got to the hospital and saw  four of the suspects with bullet wounds.

”The suspects were arrested and thrown into a waiting van.Two of the suspects were my two friends that I entertained the previous week. One of them  borrowed my uniform after  paying  20,000 Naira .That was why I had been using one uniform for two weeks .

”While in  the van they behaved maturely  as they didn’t look at me but only saying ‘Don’t worry, don’t kill us , you  are  safe’ .As I wanted to silence them with my gun  and report  later that they were trying to escape , they laughed and said ‘Just don’t worry , hold your peace, you all are in safe hands , don’t shoot’.

”At the Police station they made  statement and did not reveal where they got guns and ammunition including uniform despite being  tortured. 

”At the station I was informed that my family had been hospitalized  and should come home .When I got home the news was broken that my pregnant wife ( I married after the death of my first wife)was killed by  armed  robbers  who raided the area the previous night. I  was dejected and lost control of myself .The case was reported at the police station while their corpses were dumped at the mortuary .


”In the evening when the robbers  wanted to eat one of them asked me to summon courage and put  rat poison into their food . I thought of it  and  knew the implication .  I said ‘No’. They assured me they would not   implicate me .

”The third day some  notorious armed robbers colluded with some policemen came to the station with sophisticated weapons , killed some police officers and freed the suspects.

“I  went to bury my wife, and two children . I was no longer comfortable in the uniform .I told some of my colleagues that my health was not good as I had acute hypertension, diabetes , heart disease and  ulcer, and  I  took  medical report from a doctor .I resigned after serving for 16 years .I relocated to another  state in far north in Zamfara State where nobody knows my story. I have spent  26years here now. Yes, I can speak Hausa very well and I am Seriki .I married an Hausa lady  and that is  your mother who bore me two kids  and that is  the two of you.

”Please my sons  all these nightmares are haunting me. There was a time I used to have strange dreams, I used to see strange faces of those I  killed. I abandoned my house in Lagos and nobody ever dreamt to go there yet nobody knows where I am .’Thou shall not kill’ but I have soaked my hands in blood. Now I am running about as the so Boko Haram are raiding everywhere and killing. I cannot go back to my hometown again for nobody knew where I am since I left over 26years ago. If I die please bury me here .You can imagine why I  didn’t use cell phone and use facebook or any social media for I know I could be spotted one day.

”I have been to many churches  to confess my sins and begged for forgiveness. But will God forgive  me ? ” he asked without an answer.

As his knees , feet, and hands turned mottled bluish-purple and his breathing was no longer normal cum with his irregular heart beat yet he was restless. He started twitching for some minutes, then suddenly gave a loud cry and then  became still and  cold. 

The two sons wept profusely realizing their father had soiled his hands in blood. They quietly buried their father without inviting anybody.

This  story is fiction